Analysis of The Joker
by BatmanFanatic12
Summary: The Joker gets interviewed again. But this time, the Examiner will probe further than any man or women has ever gone into madness...


For Professional Use Only

Unauthorized View Is Prohibited

Examiner: Dr. Ethan T. Lanning

Confidential Psychological Analysis of:

Patient #0801

Name: N/A

Known Alias(s): The Joker

Date of Birth: N/A

Date of Examination: September 6, 2006

4:00-6:45 P.M. EST

Prepared By; Dr. Ethan T. Lanning & Dr. John Himmler Jr.

Exercise Caution During Examination of This Report

Forethoughts and/or Comments: My interview with The Joker was quite intriguing and at the same time, absolutely horrifying and blood curdling. This patient is either one of two conclusions: Demented to a point beyond possible human extremes, or the sanest creature to have ever walked the earth.

Begin of Review: Introductions

4:00 P.M.

As I walk in the room, I notice that the patient is looking at the ceiling. I chose not to inquire why, and instead I observe as he stares for what seemed 10 minutes, unmoving, unblinkingly, as if he had died. But at, quite to my surprise, after what seemed an eternity his head jerked up and he shot a bright smile at me.

"WELL, HELLO, DOCTOR, FANCY MEETING YOU HERE! DO YOU COME HERE OFTEN?

Ooh, wait, I don't recognize you, who are you, one of those college newbie kids trying to get a shot at my mind again? Well, I already told you, I'm an Alpha Kappa man and that's that!"

I am Dr. Ethan T. Lanning, and while I'm not a newbie, you are right about the college part. I am from Harvard University, and I was requested by the Warden himself and my former colleague.

"Well then, it's quite fine to meet a Harvard man, Doctor."

"May I ask you something, Doctor?"

Puzzled, yet already wildly enthusiastic about this encounter, I allow him.

"At Harvard, are there really those snobby rich kids who are only there because their rich?"

Well, I wouldn't like to think so, but I do believe there is.

He sits in his chair idly for a moment, and then I asked my question.

How may I call you, Mr. ah Joker?

"Mr. Joker, why that's my father's name! Call me whatever you like, Mr. ahh Ethan, is it?

You can call me, Ethan, if you like.

I will call you, Joker.

Now let's get down the reason I'm here, shall we?

"Shoot away, Doctor! I'm sure that massive cranium of yours is just on fire with questions!"

Indeed, it is.

Let's talk about your life, is that okay with you?

He nods.

Okay, I appreciate your cooperation, Mr. Joker.

Let's start with a simple question: Where were you born?

A large grin cracks up that already happy face.

"Where was _I _born? What a question!"

He puts a rather odd amount of emphasis on I. He continues.

"Well, to tell you the truth, Doctor, I don't really know."

You don't remember a city, or street, a zip code?

"Nope, not a clue, mister Doctor."

"I do remember a building, however. Me and my "friends" used to call it the wonder land."

And why is this?

" I was sixteen years old, Doctor! I remember this is the place where so many young men lost their virginity. I remember, this is the place I lost my virginity."

Was it a Brothel?

"Good guess, yes, it was, in layman's terms, a whore house!"

And you lost your virginity here? Did you enjoy it?

"Doctor, let's keep this professional, eh? But yes, I thoroughly enjoyed it. I remember, I enjoyed it so much, that I would frequently visit the Brothel, dwindling my money and exposing myself to the perils of AIDS and what not. But what did it matter to me? I'm a teenager, and so I'm invincible!"

" I recall the last time I ever went there. I went with my friend, Thomas. Quite a good looking fellow, I was thoroughly surprised he went when he was more than attractive enough for him to do it for free."

Patient appears comfortable around me. Emphasis on Appears.

"We went in, and I had frequented the place so much the girls treated me like family, but not like that because, you know, that would be sick! But anyways, I got ahead with my usual girl and left Thomas with 50 smackaroos and told him to have at it."

"Do you know what happens next?"

I'm slightly hesitant to hear the answer, but I ask "what happens?"

"My good friend Thomas, in a fit of rage, killed one of the girls! And you know why? Because the girl refused to involve herself in his, uhm, how do you say, special preference?"

A fetish?

"A scat fetish, I might add. She refused to indulge him, and so he promptly choked her to death. With _it._"

That is…. unfortunate.

"Oh, indeed, it was quite disgusting a scene. Poor girl, barely an adult, and alright taking shit from the world!"

What happened to Thomas?

"Oh, I don't know, the guy ran out that night. I never saw him again, but I remember reading the paper that they caught a man hanging in a utility closet at a power plant, covered in blood and feces…"

Let's go to something else….. Let's talk about your relationship with Ms. Harleen Quinzell?

"I like how your questions are so random, no order or rhythm to them."

"Okay then, Doctor Let's talk about Harley…."


End file.
